Heartbreak letter

A translation of Surat Putus Cinta

A love letter similar to the stage of a tapir's pregnancy.

In the ultra violet gloom of the seventh month that shines light underneath the feet of the red skies, suddenly I recalled the nostalgic eureka of our past love that we smudged together. Your presence, together with hydrogen molecules, straightened all the mess that entangled my intestines. It also taught me the meaning of turbulent and sombre yearning.

You also taught me the meaning of love, sea lion, polar bear, penguin, mountain goat, mee rebus, chendol, corridor, pencil box, shoe lace and flower pot. Then, we were like Nobita and Sizuka or Kurt Cobain and Rafeah Buang that can never be separated. Sadly, our love that got full coverage even to the planet Ziku tempted separation ending with the whole centipede farmers in Burma disappointed. You left still as KL was preparing to host the 1998 Commonwealth Games.

In reality, the separation was caused by the massive scale of rubber trees cut down in Klang Valley. When you left, I suffered when I contracted sinus and hepatitis Q without warning. Your absence forced me to wear safety helmets all the time as a precautionary measure. I could not believe what had happened. It was as if I slipped from the earth's orbit and thrown to space, where earth's gravity had no effect on me no more, after I tripped on this love that dragged till rubber-set. My life's journey darken as if trapped in a dark cave, accompanied by needle like stag lits and stalagmite.

The condominium of love that we build from bicycle mudguards and helicopter rotors were destroyed when you had a change of heart. It was clear you were no longer you when Malaysia launched MEASAT-1 satelite to space. Since then, you always ran away when you bumped into my brother in law. In the end, I realised that I was no longer needed.

Since you're gone, I'm always by myself, conversing with the papaya tree to fill up my time. Sometimes I tie carbonated drink bottles to the house pillars to make it look nicer. I will daydream all day in the fridge thinking about you who disappeared without a trace. I tried playing badminton while eating mee hailam to forget you but it was of no use. So I burnt the washing machine and beat the crap up of 4 of my neighbours' ducks as a sign that I was not the one who was wrong.

Why? Why my love? Why did all these happened? Why, after you stole my heart, you burglarized away my love and murdered it till you're killed in a tragic love accident. I felt squashed by sacks of stones that fell on my back. The suffering you've caused is too much for me to handle, as if I had to carry 75 monitor lizards and 386 baby monkeys. And now all my hope are broken to pieces as I feel like I've fallen from the KL Towers and crushed by the Petronas Twin Towers then stuck in between the gap of the LRT track and then ran over by the Komuter train till I was shredded to pieces. Oh! So tough are these ordeals.

Now it is all over. I know who I am - just a normal human being who likes to eat instant noodles. I am not McGyver, McDonald's, Superman or Kesatria Baja Hitam. Nor am I Ultraman that you've always dreamed of. I am aware of my inadequacies and the lack of public amenities in my area. No need for regrets as rice has turned to capati and the sardine can in my grasp has it's expiry date smeared. It's all so sad and all your gifts including a submarine engine have been cut to pieces to feed the cows.

Even though everything is over, here, on top of this rubber tree, I will wait for your return. As long as I can breathe, as long as there is SOGO the shopping complex, as long as there's sandal shops in Argentina, as long as Metallica has not disbanded, I will still wait for you till the sun splits to eight. Lastly, I took a final decision to wait for the electric pole in front of my house to bear fruit. When it does, I will post them to you. Would you like that?